No woman should have to go through the traumatic experience which single mother Loh Siew Hong is currently facing.

She is not the first nor last woman to have to endure this terrible treatment.

Malaysians will recall that kindergarten teacher Indira Gandhi went through the same ordeal, which for her, started 13 years ago.

Loh’s nightmare is probably just beginning, whereas Indira’s case is nowhere near to being solved.  

There are laws to protect both mother and child, but one wonders how strictly these are enforced. Why is this allowed to happen?

Both women acted on the right side of the law. Both women did not break any rules. Following their divorce, they applied to the courts to have custody of their children. The courts agreed.

However, instead of their rights and their children’s rights being exercised, these women and their children ended up being the victims.

Like Indira, single mother Loh was married to a Hindu.

Instead of the men utilizing the rights of the father to have regular access to their children, the men kidnapped them and converted them to Islam without their mother’s permission.

Instead of Islam being a personal faith, both men used it as a tool to divide families and to separate their children from their mothers.

The former husbands thought their actions would demoralize the women, but instead their former wives refused to give up.

They managed to track their children down with the hope of being reunited. However, the authorities appeared to be dragging their feet in settling these cases.

Although the Federal Court granted an appeal by Indira, who challenged the conversion of her three children to Islam by her ex-husband Muhammad Riduan Abdullah, her youngest child Prasana Diksa is still missing today.

Prasana was kidnapped by her father 12 years ago when she was only an 11-month baby.

Meanwhile, Loh lodged a police report and finally tracked her children to a location in Perlis.

Her former husband had kidnapped their three children, three years ago, and converted them to Islam.

He is now in prison for drug related offences and the children are being held by an NGO which runs a home for converts.

Indira’s husband was someone who was also jailed for crimes involving drugs.

Why do these men, who do not have steady jobs and who take drugs, subsequently destroyed the lives of their own children and their former wives?

Were they consumed with so much hate for their wives that in their warped thinking, they decided that if they could not be given custody of their children, they would act to ensure that their former wives were denied the joy and company of their own children?

Is it possible that by converting to Islam and by converting their children to Islam, the men assumed that the courts could then give them custody of their children?

Unfortunately, both men do not have stable jobs, and in Indira’s case, her daughter is also forced to live the life of a fugitive, as her former husband is evading capture by the police.

Both men probably know that the Muslim community will also place extreme pressure on the mother to either convert or to bring up the children according to the Islamic faith.

What these men cannot comprehend is that the conversion is unconstitutional, as they were converted in the absence of their mother.

In Malaysia, it is unlawful to convert children to Islam without the consent of both parents.

Moreover, were the children asked to recite the Kalimah Shahdah (affirmation of faith)?

Why should both children and mother be forced to undergo this mental torture? Will the former husbands be punished for kidnapping?

The other trauma faced by the mother is that as Hindus, both Indira and Loh cannot present a challenge in the syariah court. Only Muslims can.

What happened to the three articles of the Federal Constitution: Article 3, which allows people to practice their religions in peace and harmony, Article 5 which guarantees the right to life and liberty, and Article 11 on the freedom of religion, which confers one the right to educate a child in one’s own faith?

What happened to the Convention on the Elimination of all Forms of Discrimination Against Women, and the Convention on the Rights of the Child?

Both mothers have suffered enough. They should be reunited with their children who have also suffered the trauma of not being with their mother, especially in their formative years.

In 2019, Loh’s former husband physically assaulted her and during her stay in hospital, abducted the children.

Now that she has found the whereabouts of her children, why is the welfare department denying Loh and her children the chance to live together again as a family?

Loh has already been given sole custody of the children by the High Court. Perhaps this is one time that the Minister for Women, Family and Community Development Rina Harun should intervene to stop the destructive, revengeful tactics of former husbands, and a possibly well-meaning welfare department, to destroy the lives of innocent people.

 Sources:

1. Malaysiakini: ‘I just want to cry’: Single mom barred from seeing kids after reunion
2. Malay Mail: A mother’s appeal: I will even convert to Islam, just give me back my children
3. Free Malaysia Today: How come I can’t see my daughters but mufti can, asks distraught mother

(Mariam Mokhtar is a Freelance Writer.)